How to make a sex chat with girlfriend by cracking jokes
No one likes to hang out with a pessimistic, negative person. When I’m with my girlfriends, we’ll gossip or trash some other girl for being rude or trashy, but that’s not a nice way to act.
So, I always try to look on the bright side of life and be a “glass half full” person when I’m trying to catch a hot guy. And, let me just tell you, I’ve learned that this kind of behavior doesn’t attract guys.
Season 2, Episode 12Winston: There's nothing like the feel of a fire, a fresh baked cookie and the sweet, sweet taste of crack in your lungs. Season 3, Episode 12Jess: Do not challenge me to a sex stand-off. Season 4, Episode 14Schmidt: Don't speak to me until bedtime! You know how he gets, he turns into a cartoon elephant of yesteryear who just saw a mouse.
Season 4, Episode 11Jess: I'll take the strongest drink you have, and also a wine spritzer on the side in case I don't like it. You are the ass to my horse and I'm gonna keep you right here, right by my side where I can find ya, forever.
Amazing guy who will keep you laughing no matter what.
He seems shy at first, but when you get to really know him, he's really cool.
Season 1, Episode 21Jess: Nick, put on some pants or at least some really high socks.
Talk about yourself, current topics, news events, etc about 20% of the time, and let him control the conversation about 80% of the time. Laugh a Lot Guys are drawn to girls with a great sense of humor, and I think humor always begins with a lot of laughter.
Season 2, Episode 7Nick: No part of this conversation is making me want to boil over with rage. Monsoon Bedding, Best Erotic Maribone Hotel, Slum-Doggystyle Millionaire! Season 3, Episode 7Jess: Nick doesn't have a life plan. I once found a note that he wrote to himself that said, "Put on pants."Season 3, Episode 8Schmidt: Did I leave my Oakland Raiders yarmulke over there? Season 3, Episode 15Nick: Men don't talk to people they've dated, unless they want sex, or they're Winston. Season 3, Episodes 16-18Schmidt: It's a bar mitzvah! Season 3, Episode 19Nick: Schmidt fired me and now I'll never get to use this briefcase I bought and it was ! Schmidt: We'll lay in bed, we'll just go over the day like we usually do and that'll be it. It happened when we were dating, like, all the time.
Season 2, Episode 9Jess: You care about burritos more than my children? Season 2, Episode 10Schmidt: Everybody hates the Jews! Season 2, Episode 13Schmidt: I had only sari-related sexual ideas. Season 3, Episode 11Jess: So Nick doesn't have a traditional career. I can channel all of my sexual energy into knitting. Season 3, Episode 14Jess: Nick, I never thought I'd say this, but I need to be alone with Prince. Season 4, Episode 8Coach: You guys want to stop on the way home and get some pancakes? Nick: If you think we're going to have a bedtime chat, you're out of your mind! Season 4, Episode 15Nick: She's got a lot of hair, and it blocks sound.
I left my body, went up to heaven, saw my grandparents, thought it was weird that I saw my grandparents, came back down. Season 2, Episode 3Jess: I don't want to kiss and tell, but I ruined my dresser during intercourse. Season 3, Episode 23Winston: That's like the president and the vice president not being best friends. Winston: Come on, everybody knows they're best friends. Season 4, Episode 3Nick: Sponges make me feel exhilarated.
Only thing is, he thinks my name is Katie and that I'm a dancer and/or something involving puppets. After we saw the movie "Titanic," he started the Billy Zane Fan Club. Season 3, Episode 22Schmidt: I'm like a Hebrew cheetah. That's like taking a musical from rehearsal straight to Broadway. Schmidt: If you are for one second suggesting that I don't know how to open a musical, how dare you! Season 4, Episode 6I once tried on my girl cousin's wool tights and I didn't hate how it felt.
He tends to bring himself down often, so you should be there to help him out and make him feel better.